Cozy Posts · Health & Lifestyle

January Postcard

Dear friends,

Someday it will stop being cold, but for right now, it’s January in New Jersey and that day is likely a ways off. Sigh.

I’m still going strong on not buying unnecessary things this month, despite a few temptations, but am taking it day by day, with every day successful, so far. I am not spending on wardrobe items, coffee shops, housewares, or decor this month. I have what I need and am beyond grateful for it.

The ongoing fires in southern California remind me that true need is much more basic than what many of us deem necessary in today’s world. Family, friends, health, shelter, clothing, food, water, clean air, safety, and enough money to sustain these needs. Everything else is extra. I feel like it’s easy to forget that sometimes. It’s easy to take these things for granted through the constant buzz of consumer culture that we are bombarded with daily in the US.

I’ve been wandering a path of change over the past seven months and have learned that change takes patience and patience takes willpower. I challenge myself to exercise willpower every day in the challenges and changes I have made because they are good for me.

Exercise is tough in the winter compared to the warmer months. It takes extra willpower to get outside for a walk. It takes even more to stay outside as long as I should. Today was a weigh-in day and another loss. Being down 45 pounds since June is good enough motivation to bundle up and get a whole mess of steps in. It’s also much, much colder in winter though without my former layer of squish. I’ll put an extra sweater on and take the chill with gratitude.

It’s an Earl Grey day for tea and I’m sipping in my writing spot on the big, blue couch. A maelstrom rages in the dishwasher and the dryer’s humming in the laundry room – my domestic soundtrack for the afternoon.

I took two books out of the library last week and haven’t started either, despite being sure that I will enjoy both. Maeve Binchy and Judy Blume sit beneath the lamp on the wooden bench that my dad made whispering, “Write. Read.” It’s probably rude to ignore your idols, so, sorry ladies; I will aim to do some of both today.

Bit of a ramble today, but if you are reading this, I hope you are cozy and warm. If today’s a tough day, I hope something has yet to happen that makes you smile. If it’s a good day, then-yes! Go you! 🙂 As always, thanks for reading.

Love,

Beth

Health & Lifestyle · Healthy Habits · Minimalism

Gratitude

It’s January people and boy, oh boy, does it certainly feel like it here in NJ! I’ve got my warm socks, a chunky sweater, and a big hand-knit hat, that my sister in law made, to keep me nice and toasty while writing this. These comfies are adding a little extra security too as I’m not quite sure yet where this post is headed.

This morning, I put away the Christmas decor and the living room feels a little empty in a good way. I’m positive toward negative space. It’s easier on the eyes than our little tree with its warm white, twinkle lights. It’s easier on the mind too and I needed to get back into a writing headspace. The holidays were beautiful and festive and temporary and today felt like the day to store them away so they feel special again come next winter.

On New Year’s Eve, following spending a bit more than usual on shopping in December, I decided I would challenge myself to do a “no shop month” in January. It’s been a week and I’m finally starting to feel like I will actually be able to get through the challenge and possibly even stretch the end date. I don’t want to spend like I did in December, mostly because there is no need to anymore. It all comes down to gratitude, which I’ll get into more in a little bit.

Through the years, I have developed a strong understanding of my personal style, not to say that I have excellent style or anything. Style is subjective. Style can change based on different factors and experiences. The purpose of style is to send yourself out into the world feeling confident so you can accomplish big and little things without feeling self conscious or uncomfortable because of what you’re wearing. Everyone has a sense of personal style whether you recognize yours or not.

I may think that I dress well, but somebody else might disagree. I try not to concern myself though with the somebody else-s of the world when I put an outfit together. It doesn’t matter what somebody else thinks about my clothes so long as I like what I’m wearing and it makes me feel capable and confident. It’s when my clothes aren’t doing that anymore that indicates a time to take a step back and re-evaluate my wardrobe.

I have come to learn that many factors can influence personal style such as personality, budget, availability, occupation, hobbies, and, of course, size and appearance, among others. Back in the spring, I had a personal style that I understood cover to cover. I knew what silhouettes would flatter and conceal, which colors and patterns disguised the areas I preferred not to advertise, and which fabrics hung just so and made me feel like the best version of me.

My appearance has changed a little bit since spring and many of my old favorites don’t give me the confidence that they used to anymore. Many don’t hang just so or flatter. They swallow up a bit too much and there’s only so much a belt can do. Sometimes you just need to buy a few items to make you feel put together again. Hence, my December spree.

My body has a different shape now, a different influence on my mind than it used to, and a different influence on my sense of comfort and contentment. I am a different version of me than I was in the spring. Sometimes, looking back at old photos, it feels sort of like an out of body experience.

I am grateful to the former Beth for noticing the switch flip back in June when it came to questioning distorted hunger cues and unhealthy eating habits. That girl changed my life. I’d love to thank her, but I can’t. She is frozen in time in June looking at a photo of herself from a trip to Chicago, perched precariously on the precipice of something huge. I don’t know if anyone has ever shown up for me quite like that girl did. Certainly, no one has ever called me out on poor habits like she did. No one really could though, I guess. Some things can only come from within. Some things take discomfort to learn. Better her than me, am I right? I am proud of her though. I’m excited for her too, if it’s worth anything from where I stand in her future.

My body changed and my style floundered a bit for a while. It’s a weird feeling to be a size that I never fathomed associating with me. It’s a mental hurdle and a new adventure. I was never one for numbers. Now, I am Milo in Digitopolis with no Tock at my side. From bi-weekly weigh-ins to occasional measurements to money spent on new wardrobe items, it’s easy to get lost in the numbers, in the purchases and returns, in the bank account balance, gas mileage, and shipping and delivery dates. I need a break from numbers, frankly. The fun of shopping can quickly turn into buyer’s remorse and more work in the long run and I just don’t need that right now.

This January is going to be for other things. My wardrobe has all the things it needs and more. There’s no need to shop. I have learned to listen to need over want with my eating habits so much so that I am confident I can do that with my shopping habits as well. This month is for focusing on travel planning and writing, for cozy nights in on freezing days, for doing puzzles with my husband, for bundled-up walks in the crisp chilly air, and for experiencing all of life’s little moments with the presence and attention they deserve. I have all I need. I have all that matters. I am abundant with gratitude and that’s something you just can’t buy.

Cozy Posts · Movies

Rule Number 32

A couple of weeks ago, we watched a favorite we hadn’t seen in a while, the 2009 Horror/Comedy, Zombieland. Throughout the movie, Columbus (Jessie Eisenberg) introduces his set of rules for surviving a world overrun by zombies while trying to find his way from Texas to Ohio. The movie takes a sharp westward turn soon after Columbus unites with the Twinkie-craving, trigger-happy Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson), followed by the cunning duo, Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin). The movie has become somewhat of a cult classic and leans heavily on the comedy, with the obligatory side of brains- of course.

But back to the rules.

There is one of Columbus’ rules in particular that Mike likes to quote all of the time and always in reference to yours truly. It’s Rule Number 32, Enjoy the little things. I find immense joy in little things. Couldn’t really tell you why; it just happens that way. Color me lucky, I guess.

Sometimes “the little things” are physically small objects, like the tiny rubber elephant that I bought in Seattle in 2016 and still carry in my handbag or the Christmas bird with the busted wing that I bought from Michael’s on Halloween back in 2020. These sorts of little things were very intentional additions to my happiness. I learned of their existence in the world and knew they were meant for me and so, I made them mine.

There are also the little sensory experiences that bring me a lot of joy such as feeling the heat from the stove while boiling the kettle, breathing in the earthy scent of crispy book pages, or peeling apart the golden crust of a flaky croissant, to name just a few. Think Amélie and her petits plaisirs, like cracking the caramelized topping of crème brulée with the back of a spoon. She gets it.

I collect these little moments, these “little things”.

Today, one of my little things is the combination of the cello vamp and string line in Bleacher’s “91” which I have playing on repeat as I write this post. Yesterday, it was getting a Christmas card from my cousin, Jen, the scent of warm, coconut curry that lingered long after Mike made dinner, and enjoying a scoop of Graeter’s Black Raspberry Ice Cream from a little ramekin with a little spoon. 😊

Each day has lots of these little things, lots of little opportunities to experience joy.

Today was a coffee sort of morning, thanks to the complimentary Starbucks Holiday Blend that came with our latest Hello Fresh delivery and I just couldn’t resist brewing a cup in my favorite mug (see, there’s another one right there). Sitting by the window in one of our outdoor chairs, that was recently cleaned off and pulled inside for the winter, is one of my favorite things in the colder months. I sipped and watched the waves roll in on the beach while toasting my toes beneath the electric baseboard. I wish I could share that feeling with everyone; the world would be a much calmer place.

My caffeine-induced heartbeat’s trying to match the cello vamp now, but lacks the necessary arrythmia to do so. Christmas Eve is next week, a day that feels more all-encompassing of the celebration of the holiday than Christmas Day, at least in my personal experience. The gathering, the revelry, the heraldry. And lots of little joys all around. A roaring fire in my parents’ woodstove, Celtic Christmas music playing, warm mugs of tea and their swirling clouds of steam, and lots of smiles and laughs.

Writing this post is giving me joy too. Writing most of them has, for that matter. I checked and this is number 97. Soon it will be number 100, but that won’t be a little thing at all, will it? No, that one will feel pretty big, I think.

Thank you for reading and Happy Holidays, friends. I hope you practice Rule Number 32 this season, however you celebrate. Zombies aside, it’s not a bad one to live by.

Poetry

Defiance Gravity

What happens when you drop decorum from a skyscraper?

It’s a physics equation, on paper, or no?

Since gravity doesn’t apply to behavior,

it lands both harder and not at all.

It’s a complex figure,

inserted amid the text of some published melding of the minds,

paired with questions posed by Isaac and Albert

beside photos of graffitied translations from ancient philosophers

frescoed into tonal gray cement that stains when it rains,

or illegible neon spray painted on shiny towers of glass that, themselves, 

set fire to parked cars in the summertime.

The author couldn’t actually explain,

just uses big words that blend together

until you don’t care about the answer anymore.

But if you put it to the test,

the reality can make quite the mess

and cleaning up takes time.

So mind your Ps and Qs, my friends

and queue your peas up end to end.

Then, pop and gnash

or stew and mash;

they’re good that way, I hear.

Oh- and just remember, dear;

how you act does, indeed, matter.

See, rules don’t only break when dropped.

They can bend,

amend,

and shatter.

Cozy Posts

December Postcard

Dear friends,

It’s a chilly, damp evening here in New Jersey. Outside, the night is black taffeta, embroidered with the glowing orbs of street lamps in the fog. I’m sitting on the big, blue couch enjoying the tree which is up and twinkling while Joni sings through the speakers, “Oh, I wish I had a river I could skate away on.”

I forgot about my tea- as I often do- so it’s lukewarm beside me, but still steeped with warm spices that combat the weather. There is laundry to be folded and dishes to be done, but for right now, chores come second to a quiet moment. I’d just rather write to you than put the house in order.

My head is full of sparkly thoughts and familiar faces as I was lucky to see a lot of friends and some family over the course of the past few days- with more on the horizon. Everyone is the same, I find- beautiful, mismatched combinations of happy, confused, successful, busy, lost, and right-on-track souls. We all vary and that’s the part I find most beautiful. No person I know is perfect and I prefer it that way.

This night has me craving some serious “hygge” (hoo-gah), a word that encompasses the Danish spirit and habit of curating coziness in everyday spaces and moments. In pursuit of hygge, I’m all cozied up in warm socks, a big chunky cardigan, and a reindeer sweater. The table lamps are on and the ornaments on the tree project little film reels of memories in my head, mementos and tokens of past trips, handmade creations, and lasting friendships. We went with a fake tree this year, but it looks pretty real, so I don’t mind, though I do miss the smell of fresh cut pine permeating the room.

I find myself reflecting tonight. It’s been a good year, overall- imperfect, but interesting, as any year worth its salt ought to be. I learned a little and grew a lot, taking refuge in books and music like my life depended on it. My reading list has twenty books checked off, which reminds me, I need to choose a new selection, or perhaps I’ll reopen one I’ve already read. I think I could use a little handmade love from Molly Weasley or the homely hospitality of Elrond this time of year.

Or maybe it’s Maeve Binchy again. “This Year it Will Be Different”– an apt title to end a year that’s sparked some changes for me, that’s made me feel whole at times and absolutely drained in others, a year that’s led me to physical health, mental clarity, and self-acceptance more so than others have. This year was well-lived. I’ll take that and be grateful for it and wish you one just as thought provoking and inspiring in the year to come.

It’s time now, though, to reheat the kettle and hunt down some words. A world is waiting in a book on the shelf, after all, and I believe I’m overdue for a visit.

Cozy Posts · Nostalgic Posts

My Desk

Well hello there, you! This morning, I am sitting at my desk in what we call “The Big Room”. The desk, a scuffed up IKEA dining table bought by Mike’s roommate sometime in 2011, has served many functions over the years and has more than a few scars to show for it. It is imbued with the soul that comes from years of multipurpose use. It has served as a dining table, a catch-all for clutter, a boardgame and puzzle surface, an art studio, an interview office, a Friendsgiving buffet, a Christmas tree stand, and a TV stand, among other things I can’t recall. I am sure it is embedded with heat stains and maybe even a little grease from Williamsburg Pizza boxes and the condensation of water rings from ice cold bottles of Lagunitas IPA and Bell’s Two Hearted, fresh from the bodega down the street on Union Avenue.

When we first moved back to New Jersey, we used it as our dining table for a little while until my parents visited briefly during the pandemic to drop off some essential supplies and my mom laughed at how small it looked in the space. And so, our little, old table was retired from high traffic use and replaced by a newer, bigger, blander model from Amazon. I squirrelled the old one away in the laundry room for a while until its current purpose dawned on me. Afterall, every writer needs a desk. Wasn’t I a writer once?

Nestled in the corner of the Big Room, topped with a jar displaying two Harry Potter wands that my cousin and her husband made for me, a rock my sister brought back from Ireland, some 40-watt soft-white lamplight, and a pink, paper box of my nana’s that contains my writing books, this space is my main access to creation. It is rare that I sit at my desk and feel any sort of writer’s block. It has helped me through blog posts, fiction projects, plot holes, a play, poems, greeting cards, resumes, cover letters, emails, and even text messages. When I’m feeling unmotivated and uninspired, the awareness to sit down at my desk weighs on me and pressures productivity. And, like the drunk, scarred, slob that it is, it isn’t quiet about it.

My Desk

I like writing in the Big Room with the curtains drawn and the table lamps on. It’s cozy and dark and when I turn the heat up or bundle up in chunky-knit sweaters and sweatpants with a mug of tea near at hand, it’s even warm. Perhaps the best characteristics about the room however, for the purpose of writing, are that we don’t sleep in here for much of the year and that I can close the door to distraction.

In his memoir, “On Writing”, Stephen King mentions the importance of writing a first draft with the door closed. I am easily distracted and when my focus is interrupted, it starfishes onto something new and the suction can be a force to be reckoned with. If I am sitting up in the main area of our home, my closed door is represented by a large pair of headphones. That being said, being able to close a physical door comes in handy for me.

The Big Room is usually where we put guests when they come to visit. It has more space for luggage, kids, and pets. It even has a desk and a comfortable chair. I originally intended for the Big Room to be “our room” and hung our two framed wedding pictures on the wall, but by the time it got really cold our first year of living here, we learned pretty quickly that the little room holds heat in much better and so we make an annual migration in the fall and spring between the two. And so, our guests are stuck with us looking all glammed up when they stay in the Big Room. I guess I’ll just apologize for our not looking quite that pretty all the time!

Anyway, I’m using this post as a warm-up to jump back into a fiction project and I feel like it’s time to switch gears now. I’ll take a little break and make some tea and then come right back and get to work. Old Pizza Stains McDenty Face has me on the clock and my attention’s good and starfished.

Travel

Pennsylvania Getaways: Gettysburg

The sun is still sleeping as I sit down to write this morning and I’ve been up for a while. It’s raining substantially for the first time in a long time and with recent water restrictions issued by the state, New Jersey certainly needed this.

I’m sipping on steaming Earl Gray from my favorite mug at the kitchen table while cooking a batch of steel cut oats on the stove. I hear them bubble and breathe behind me under my lax supervision and am already dreaming of spoonfuls swirled with hints of creamy peanut butter and real maple syrup.

I have been trying to think of how best to start this post for a few days now, with no luck. The words evaded me, creeping in my wake like the shadow of a silent army whose next move I couldn’t predict. Sometimes first lines attack by surprise and facing them becomes urgent.

This one’s about three days in July of 1863.

Growing up, I visited Gettysburg a few times with my family, my dad and my uncle being huge history buffs, but I was never quite old enough to appreciate the sobering significance of the town’s quaint streets and picturesque scenery: rolling hills dotted with clusters of trees, farms, orchards, rocky outcrops, and majestic monuments. This time felt different, however, and I went in more prepared to experience the weight of the place.

Driving through downtown Gettysburg on a Friday evening in early November, it wasn’t obvious that the town was much different from any other historic location we’d visited in the eastern US. The streets were lined with small businesses, shops, restaurants, and colorful, old buildings. The red brick sidewalks around Lincoln Square were packed with tourists on their way to dinner, drinks, or an evening walking tour, little shopping bags swinging in hand with purchases from specialty boutiques and souvenir shops from among the town’s plethora of offerings.

We continued on our drive down Baltimore Street to our hotel, Best Western Gettysburg, located in the historic part of town, across the street from the battlefield. On our way, we passed more historic looking buildings mixed in amongst even more gift shops, museums, art galleries, ghost tour companies, and taverns.

“That’s where we’re going tonight,” I said to Mike as we passed Dobbin House Tavern, gesturing to a stone house on our right, set back a little from the road. Each of its colonial style windows flickered with inviting candlelight and I found myself looking forward to dinner. I knew I had been there before as a kid, but couldn’t picture the inside other than a vague memory of a historical diorama of an underground railroad refuge.

We checked into the hotel, got settled in our room, and met my sister and her husband back down in the lobby. The restaurant was only a short walk from the hotel, but it was chilly outside and the cozy tavern, its waiting area appointed with a huge hearth and rustic, colonial furnishings, offered us much appreciated respite from the wind. We found my dad standing near the host stand among a small crowd of others waiting to be seated and he greeted us with his usual enthusiasm and urged us to go check out the secret hideout that was partway up a narrow staircase off the waiting room.

He looked around the little waiting area and said, “I don’t know where mom went.” We didn’t know either and had not seen her outside. While my dad went out to solve that mystery, the rest of us went to check out the underground railroad display. The crawlspace was even smaller than I remembered and contained life-size mannequin depictions of people in hiding within its cramped confines, representing a stop on their harrowing journey to escape enslavement, one fraught with peril and risk of capture at any turn, even north of the Mason-Dixon Line.

It turned out my mom had been looking for us outside along Baltimore Street, but we had come in from the road that ran behind the tavern instead and did not initially cross paths. Once reunited, it wasn’t long before a woman dressed in colonial attire summoned us all to follow her and seated us in the main dining room, which had a cozy, refined atmosphere with low-lit overhead fixtures and wooden tables adorned with blue and white dinnerware and candlesticks sheathed in hurricane glass.

We enjoyed the hearty tavern fare and good conversation, a highlight of which was when my dad dropped his voice to an awed whisper to tell us, “This is the oldest house in Gettysburg.” According to the tavern’s website, the house was built in 1776 and was the home of Reverend Alexander Dobbin and his family. Guided tours of the house are available for those looking to delve deeper into the home’s history as well as that of the Dobbin family. We, however, opted only to dine on this visit.

While at dinner, we established some plans to take a bus tour of the battlefield and visit the Gettysburg National Military Park Museum and Cyclorama the next day. After finishing our meal, we all headed back to the hotel and turned in for the night to decompress from the long drive and to get some rest. While the room was very comfortable, I won’t pretend like I wasn’t a little worried I’d wake up in the middle of the night to find the ghost of a civil war soldier hovering by the foot of the bed. Pushing my irrational fears of phantom soldiers aside, I slept well and, needless to say, my worries did not materialize.

I’ve been to many a historic place with my family, but we frequented Gettysburg more than others and because of this, I’ve always known that it holds a unique sort of charm for people fascinated by American history- and rightly so. The streets of the town and its surrounding farms, fields, and woods were, after all, the site of the bloodiest battle fought on American soil.

The bus tour was fine. In hindsight, we should have done the museum first and then the tour, so that’s on me for booking our combo tickets in the wrong order. Personally, I think I would opt for a self-guided driving tour next time due to personal humiliation reasons. Our guide made lots of attempts at jokes that didn’t really land and it felt like being in some mobile, history class detention where the punishment was rapid-fire, pop quiz questions asked aloud at random, for which you paid $46 for the study material, but it didn’t arrive on time.

I’ll explain further. To my horror, I was called on by the tour guide as we stood overlooking Oak Hill and Ridge, after he gave a scenario during which my mind inconveniently wandered. I’ll relive it for you all now in hopes of processing it better myself.

“Cape May!” barked the guide, “What’s your name?”

“Beth,” I said, knowing I’d answered that question correctly, at least, as my panic began to rise. I instantly regretted wearing a hat with words on it, wondering just what on Earth he had been saying a few moments ago.

“What do you do if you’re the leader of the Confederate Army in this situation?”

One- I got nothin’. I completely froze and forgot how to speak and was very quickly turning into a Jersey tomato.

Two- Such a scenario would never happen in real life both due to my own moral compass and my leadership inexperience.

Three- Mike piped up behind me with the helpful suggestion of, “Free the slaves,” which I concluded was the only correct answer, regardless of what the guide was actually looking for.

The real answer was apparently “shoot”, but for the life of me, I couldn’t tell you the context behind it.

After the bus tour was over, I buried my recent tussle with shame deep down with all the other fun stuff and we grabbed a quick lunch at the cafe in the Visitor’s Center. Next, we queued up for our timed entry to The Gettysburg Cyclorama film and painting. My mom was most excited for this part and I was eager to see the painting with the intriguing name that she kept mentioning.

The film portion of the experience, narrated by Morgan Freeman, was informative and interesting and provided a summary and timeline of the events and circumstances that led to the start of the American Civil War up through the battle of Gettysburg. It discussed the deeply rooted economic and moral issues upon which the elite of the American south had founded and sustained their fortunes: the issue of “Slave Labor” vs. “Free Labor”, free labor meaning that the laborer was free to earn income from the fruits of their own labor.

After the short film, we were led up to The Cyclorama, a striking, 360 degree painting depicting Pickett’s Charge. The massive oil painting is the work of French cyclorama painter, Paul Philippoteaux, and his team of assistants, and provides a unique insight into the experience of the battlefield on July 3, 1863, the final day of the Battle of Gettysburg. In more recent years, sculptural installations have been added in addition to the accompanying light and audio show and narration to further immerse the viewer in the painting.

The experience of viewing this impressive work will surely move any observer and garner their attention for the scale and chaos of the final day of the bloodiest battle in history fought on American soil that squashed General Lee and the Confederate Army’s final hopes of overtaking the northern states. The artist and his team visited and studied the battlefield nineteen years after the battle took place and gathered information using guidebooks, maps, and interviews with veterans in order to depict the scene with accuracy. If you go to Gettysburg, do not pass up the opportunity to see this incredible piece.

Armed with a visual of the battlefield in action, we headed into the museum. The Gettysburg Foundation website recommends allotting two hours for this museum, but if you are really interested in all of the details, civilian accounts, and original artifacts, it would be wise to allow yourself much more time. A few standouts from the museum for me were:

  • A photo of Gettysburg taken a few days before the battle, picturing an idyllic, quiet town
  • General Lee’s modest encampment cot, medical chest, and field desk
  • Accounts of the days leading up to the battle, the battle itself, and the horrors of its aftermath, heavily left to the Gettysburg civilians to clean up and manage.
  • The story of Gettysburg’s “Citizen Hero”, John Burns, a veteran of The War of 1812 who followed the sounds of the battle from his porch to join the Union Army and got captured and subsequently released by the Confederate Army
  • A room dedicated to President Abraham Lincoln’s famed Gettysburg Address, which he finished writing while staying at the David Wills House in Gettysburg off what is now Lincoln Square, before delivering it on the battlefield in November 1863.

Three days in Gettysburg led to an estimated 51,000 casualties across both sides and one civilian death- a young woman named Jennie Wade, who was shot through two doors in her sister Georgia’s kitchen while preparing dough for bread to help feed the Union Army. She was originally buried in the front yard of her sister’s home with the help of Union soldiers, and has since been relocated to the Evergreen Cemetery, the site of Lincoln’s delivery of The Gettysburg Address, and not far from her beau, Jack Skelly.

On our final day in Gettysburg, we revisited some of the sites covered on our bus tour and some, surprisingly not. We drove up to Little Round Top and walked to the lookout to take in the beautiful, sprawling view of the fields and hills below and afar. Below to our left was the outcrop known as Devil’s Den. We walked down the hill to explore there further and vague memories of the place stirred in me at the sight of children running around and playing on and through the boulders. My first memories of Gettysburg from when I was a little kid involve climbing on cannons with my cousins and sister and wanting McDonalds. And they’d let that kid lead the Confederate Army? I don’t think so.

Gettysburg will play tricks on you. At times, it can be easy to forget that you are standing on what is essentially a sprawling cemetery because it is a place full of natural beauty, not to mention it has also been heavily influenced by commercial tourism over the years. But then there are moments when the picture becomes clearer: when you can imagine the drums and the cannon fire, the shots and the battle cries of soldiers charging ahead into uncertain fates, where you can smell the stench of fear and overwhelming loss in the air, see the grass stained purple with hot blood, soldiers and civilians collecting the fallen in the aftermath, following the muffled utterances of the wounded still holding on.

There is never a monument far to remind visitors of the immense sacrifice on both sides during this battle. Our tour guide told us that Gettysburg is one of the most decorated battlefields in the world and that wherever monuments were erected indicated where those soldiers fought during the battle. It was sobering and weighty as I knew it would be and I’m glad we went back together.

For our last stop on our trip, we visited the grounds of President Eisenhower’s farm. The house was closed for the season, but strolling around between the buildings and the helipad ended our trip on a lighter note than the image of craggy entrapment that Devil’s Den conjured up for me. I remember writing a book report on President Eisenhower in the fourth grade and I’ll just say that I didn’t do very well on it. I hope you will enjoy this post more than Ms. Masters enjoyed my book report. This concludes my Pennsylvania posts, so mourn or celebrate that as you will and, as always, thanks for reading.

Health & Lifestyle · Mental Health · Music · Reviews & Reflections

Light

This one might stay just for me. I don’t know yet. If you are reading now, then that’s obviously not the case.

Yesterday was an anxious, distracted day, for no reason in particular. Bombarded with cravings to snack, drink coffee, and to shop for a new winter coat (despite not knowing what my current size is, let alone what it will be- come the actual colder months) while I was meant to be editing an unfinished piece introduced weighty doubt into the morning that carried on until I drifted off to sleep last night. I acknowledge that I am not even in the same time zone as the realm of perfection and some days are just bound to be spent lost in struggle city without a map. Maybe I should have given in to one of those cravings and the day wouldn’t have been such a write-off, but I resisted whether that was the right call or not. Take that as you will.

Yesterday evening I was on my own while Mike was out and I decided to revisit Beyonce’s “II Most Wanted” having enjoyed it while listening to her full album “Cowboy Carter” a week ago. The song features Miley Cyrus. The sound of Miley’s soothing, silky rasp reminded me of lyrics for one of her own songs so I queued up the “Used to Be Young” video next. 

I watched a bleary eyed Miley play her vulnerability to the camera and I got chills from the top of my head down to my elbows. The video reminded me of those times when you catch yourself in the mirror when you are feeling low and suddenly see your struggle magnified. It felt like Miley was singing to herself in a mirror, guiding herself back up from the bottom of the spiral. It was inspirational and today I’m going to guide myself back up from my own depths.

My lack of productivity yesterday feels like a setback going into today and I’m just as stuck as I was when I sat down with my lap desk and laptop yesterday morning. Today, I chose a different spot. Sometimes you have to follow the inspiration to find motivation and my tiny desk looked inspiring in the filtered morning light beneath the windows in the living room. So, I am writing this sitting on the floor with my keyboard on my tiny desk and my laptop propped up on a stand atop one of our living room end tables. When my hips start to scream and my feet go numb, I’ll move. After that, there’s no telling if the magic of the location will wear off or if I simply need to wait for the pins and needles to subside to resume my work for the day in the correct place. It’s always a mystery. Setting goals is cute when it comes to making art, but art isn’t always cooperative when it comes to following the rules. 

Remember to be kind to yourself. Your flaws are part of you. Your flaws give you dimension. Balance. They make the sparkly moments more dazzling by comparison. 

Maybe this won’t be just for me, after all. I can’t be the only one who feels like this some days. I mean, Miley feels like this some days. If you needed this today, we’re in this together, my friend. If you didn’t and you’re thinking man, what a wackadoodle, don’t worry; I’m alright. Where there are shadows, there’s always light.

Travel

Pennsylvania Getaways: Harrisburg & The Poconos

Hey friends! For today’s post, I am going to continue our little adventure through scenic Pennsylvania. We’ll make a brief stop in the state’s capital for some good music before visiting a region renowned for its access to the great outdoors. So, go grab some tea or coffee and get settled in a comfy place. Ready? Ok! Let’s get started.

Harrisburg

Our stop in Harrisburg in mid-October was brief, our long journey there flanked by picturesque scenery, fall foliage, and political campaign billboards for the, then, upcoming Presidential election. Pennsylvania is a “battleground” state in the political sense and the increase in campaign signage for both major political parties compared to New Jersey’s amount was not subtle.

Anyway… back to Harrisburg. Equipped with two Trampled by Turtles concert tickets, a new car that actually works (RIP Silver Bullet), and a hotel reservation downtown, we were lured by the music. The city welcomed us with a majestic view of the state capitol building and complex on our way, which, in hindsight, we probably should have paid a dedicated visit to as it was a spectacle of its own.

Lodging

Judging from the map, the Hilton Harrisburg looked like it would be a close enough walk to the concert venue, XL Live. We checked into the hotel after navigating the labyrinthine parking situation and spent a longer than usual amount of time at check-in due to a friendly reservation agent who was very nice and even gave us some complimentary bags of chocolates upon checking in. As a frequent Hilton guest and Silver member, the chocolates were new, but were definitely a nice touch! We checked into our room, changed for the show, and got to work hunting down a cozy spot for a quick dinner.

Dinner

McGrath’s Pub fit the bill and was a short walk from our hotel. On our walk there through downtown Harrisburg, on a Friday evening- mind, it seemed a little strange to us that there were not many people out. Still, the pub was a welcoming respite after our long drive and we snagged a couple open seats at the bar and ordered some drinks and dinner. McGrath’s had quick, friendly service, a good draft selection, and standard pub fare, which is just what we were looking for. I also enjoyed the warm, comfortable ambiance, pretty stained glass windows behind the bar, and the sculptural light fixture above us that was adorned with various retired tap handles.

The Show

After dinner, we made a quick stop to stow our leftovers in our room and then headed right back out to walk to XL Live. Harrisburg is, perhaps, just not a walking city. On our twenty minute walk to the venue, we only saw three people and also had to turn on our flashlights for one particularly dark section. Still, despite the somewhat eerie walk, the closer we got to the venue, the more excited I got to see the show! We made an agreement to take a rideshare back to our hotel if we didn’t see other people walking toward downtown after the concert and then got in line to go inside the venue.

Walking into XL Live reminded me of walking into the Starland Ballroom at sixteen to see The Academy Is… for the first time. The hot static of nostalgia tingled my neck and made me smile in the way one might when they just can’t help it. I was excited to finally see a band that I’d been listening to for over a decade, hear songs that have been both entertainment and medicine, see the musicians who made it all happen with their calloused fingertips and Minnesota influences. Mike grabbed us some PBRs (or Pabst for those who call it by its other name) from the bar as the opener finished their set and then we wormed our way to the center of the crowd to get a better view of the stage.

Trampled by Turtles (Mandolin player, Erik Berry, all the way on the left)

The show was everything I hoped it would be and more. We were happy to hear a lot of the band’s older material along with the new material they were touring, from their EP, Always Here. If you haven’t experienced bluegrass or think you don’t like the genre, I suggest giving this band a listen. The talent can’t be ignored, Dave Simonett’s lyrics are poetry, and it’s evident that the guys are just having a lot of fun performing together. Some particular highlights for us to hear live were Kelly’s Bar and Wait So Long, though perhaps the most mesmerizing spectacle of all was the mandolin player’s hair blowing dramatically in the breeze from the fan at his feet- simply breathtaking.

After the show, more than three people were walking back towards downtown so we chose to walk too. Energized by the show and wanting to stretch the night, we headed back to our tried and true McGrath’s in want of one more drink before turning in. I opted for an Old Fashioned to compliment the evening’s spirit of nostalgia. It didn’t disappoint.

The Delaware Water Gap & The Poconos:

We left Harrisburg the next morning, having done what we’d come to do, and made our way back east to the Mount Minsi trailhead on the Pennsylvania side of the Delaware Water Gap. The parking at the trailhead was crowded and there were no spots until about ten minutes after we arrived. It was what we expected since we did not arrive very early in the morning, like most trail guides recommend. After securing a coveted spot, we enjoyed a little lunch to fuel up for our hike- some Wawa hoagies and fruit, then laced up our hiking boots and got started on the trail, doing our best to decipher the mostly-downloaded trail guide as we did to make sure we were headed in the right direction.

We have wanted to hike Mount Minsi since hiking its neighbor, Mount Tammany, across the Delaware back in 2021. It’s funny how sometimes you just don’t quite get around to doing the things you’ve been wanting to do, isn’t it? Well, it felt good to finally get around to this and to be in good enough shape to complete the hike comfortably. Our adventure up the little mountain took us to a couple of scenic view points- one of which mirrored the lookout on Mount Tammany (pictured above) that we had climbed to three and a half years earlier. We also wound our way through multiple rhododendron tunnels and up and down a few minor rock scrambles. We saw exactly one snake, which was one more snake than I had hoped to see, once we were almost done with the hike and that provided a good little startle. We hopped back in the car, freeing up our spot for another one waiting and headed out for yet another bout of hiking elsewhere.

Bushkill Falls

I’ll lead off by saying I didn’t know exactly what to expect pulling into the parking lot of Bushkill Falls. The entrance to the trail had an off-brand theme park vibe that I felt a little resistant to at first, being in a great outdoors mindset for the day. There were multiple buildings, among them a ticket office, visitor’s center, souvenir shops, an apparel shop, fudge kitchen, snack bar, playground, maze, picnic area, and restrooms. There was a silhouette cutout of Bigfoot by the ticket office, proposing the challenge to observant visitors to find two others like him along the trails. The place was also swarmed with families. Had it been a mistake to come to this woodsy Disneyland among the trees? The cost to access the trails to the waterfalls seemed pretty steep at first at $20 each. I think I went in feeling prepared for it not to live up to the price and then I saw the staircases and it all made sense.

Every day at Bushkill Falls is leg day, my friends. The park has an extensive system of winding, wooden staircases and bridges that provide access to beautiful views of the park’s multiple waterfalls. These staircases must require constant maintenance, which explained the ticket price right of the bat, and even made twenty bucks seem like a bit of a bargain.

The grandest of the waterfalls is located right at the beginning of the trail and is aptly named “Main Falls”. If you are looking for a fun outing with your kids, you could spend a decent amount of time just in the park’s entry area and viewing Main Falls without too much grumbling from the kiddos or the less actively inclined participants in your group. We, however, were looking to put some distance between ourselves and the crowds and headed down the stairs of the “red trail” toward the nature trails.

Main Falls, Bushkill Falls

Once we passed a sign that advertised that what lay beyond were trails intended for experienced hikers only, the crowds died down a lot. We passed more people than we did on our walks in Harrisburg to and from XL Live, but had little portions of the trail completely to ourselves. Shortly into the nature trail, we found a Bigfoot silhouette and I couldn’t resist asking Mike to snap these photos before thanking him for putting up with me.

We realized the distances depicted on the map provided by the Visitor’s Center did not accurately represent the actual distances between each waterfall and lookout, nor their actual location on the side of the creek. It made for a journey that kept us a little on our toes and each discrepancy we came across provided a little comic relief. Once we got closer to a waterfall called “Bridesmaid’s Falls”, we caught a glimpse of herds of creatures in their natural habitat. The Poconos are, after all, a popular destination for bachelorette parties. I, myself, can recall more than one occasion of traipsing around the region with a “Bride Tribe” Shot Glass Necklace and even a green wig, in one case. I suppose the name of this waterfall was a particular draw for these herds of women along with one further along called “Bridal Veil Falls”. Bushkill knows its market, I guess.

Bushkill Falls Trail Map

We ended our hike with a scenic view of the Delaware Valley which had not yet fully blossomed with fall color, but still provided a picturesque sight (and another silhouette of Bigfoot!). With tired muscles from miles and miles of inclined walking over the course of one day, we headed back to the car, which was good an dirty by this point, and drove to our final stop to check into our hotel.

Delaware Valley Lookout, Bushkill Falls

Stroudsburg

We checked into The Penn Stroud in downtown Stroudsburg where our room was comfortable, though the lighting was a bit stark for my taste. If it were up to me, Bright White lightbulbs would be reserved for medical facilities, research labs, emergency exits, and nowhere else. The Penn Stroud, however, seemed to have a different opinion of them and used them in abundance. There was a desk lamp in the room, so we switched that baby on and that provided relief from the bright-as-day lighting. We freshened up and headed back out for dinner.

We tried out Farmhouse Mainstreet in downtown Stroudsburg, which had a very different menu to the all-day brunch menu posted on their website, but we decided to still give it a shot. It looked cozy with a distressed vintage vibe in the pictures online and even would have been if bright-as-day lights weren’t trending in Stroudsburg. I ordered the Apple Arugula Salad with Chicken which was delicious and Mike ordered something that tasted much less impressive. The service was weird and the servers seemed annoyed with one another, which was uncomfortable as diners, but my cocktail and meal were delicious so it could just be that we came on an off day. I hope so.

After dinner, we headed down the street to Down River Brewing Company. The brewery was set deep within a fluorescent lit indoor mall type place and we instantly turned around upon seeing it was karaoke night. Now, I’m a fan of karaoke sometimes, but it wasn’t what we were looking for on a Saturday night on our little weekend away. We switched gears and headed to Finola’s Irish Pub, finally finding a place that suited the ambiance we were craving.

A perfect pint, courtesy of Finola’s

At Finola’s, my perfectly poured pint of Guinness picked up my spirits as we sat there at the bar, puzzled by Saturday night in Stroudsburg (and Friday night in Harrisburg). I followed my Guinness with a non-alcoholic beer to stretch the night a little further before we headed back to our hotel for some much needed sleep after our long day of driving and hiking.

The previous evening’s track record left me a little wary of brunch that Sunday, but there was no need for that whatsoever. The Cure Cafe was a cozy little spot on Main Street that had us leaving Stroudsburg on a high note. We sat outside, bundled up in our jackets and I had my first coffee since May (five months with no coffee- I’m still in disbelief) and enjoyed every sip of it alongside my breakfast. With achy leg muscles, full bellies, and a family birthday party to get to, we got back in the car and headed out, leaving the Poconos behind us until next time.

If you are enjoying these little PA travel journals, great, because there’s one more to come! If not, bear with me and I’ll be sure to write some strictly cozy posts soon. Thanks for reading and have a cozy day! 💖

Travel

Pennsylvania Getaways: West Chester

We’ve gone to Pennsylvania more than we’ve gone to most places this year and I haven’t written about any of these little jaunts since a post from last December, which, if I’m being honest, was mostly about New Jersey anyway. The Keystone State little-spoons my beloved Garden State and in my head, the two go together like meat and potatoes.

Ever since before I was born, my family in New Jersey and my family in Pennsylvania would cross state lines frequently, whether it be for birthdays, holidays, weddings, funerals, or simply weekends spent amongst each others’ company. There were more adults than kids when all the East Coasters got together, so the parents, my Aunt Arlene, and my Nana could relax a little while my sister, my cousins, and I ran around and played like little Wild Things, exploding with imaginative creativity.

To this day, Mike and I often find ourselves climbing into the car and making the trek to PA for some reason or another. The journey has become so familiar that I forget these excursions are even trips at all. For my next few posts, I am going to focus on a few destinations in the Keystone State that were new to us this year. So, without further ado, let’s get started on today’s featured destination!

West Chester

What brings you to West Chester? you might ask in a tone questioning our judgement or maybe even our sanity as one shop clerk and one winery barman asked me while on our trip there. For vacation! I replied, wondering why West Chester seemed to have been discounted as a vacation destination by its own locale. Still, the town and the surrounding landscape provided a charming weekend getaway for us, so let me fill you in on the details because I know after that intro, you are raring to get yourselves there!

Lodging

We stayed downtown at the Hotel Warner, an art deco style building, constructed where the grand Warner Theatre once stood. The hotel’s lobby was formerly the lobby of the theatre, which was left standing after a portion of the theatre was demolished in the 80s, and paid homage to the location’s history with photos, a mural, and memorabilia.

Our room was comfortable for our two-night stay and a light continental breakfast was included each morning. There was a cozy reading spot in the room where I crushed a good chunk of The Alice Network by, Kate Quinn, posted my Tolkien Takeaways post, and Googled the poet Baudelaire.

Looking at the History page of the Hotel Warner’s website now, there is a funny line about the Warner Theatre that is reminiscent of the reactions I got from locals regarding why we chose West Chester as a vacation destination, “The theatre was considered so grand by the local people that it was rumored to have been intended for Westchester New York and put in West Chester, Pennsylvania by mistake.” Believe in yourself, West Chester! Because the people believe in you!

Dining & Drinks

When we went to West Chester back at the end of March, I had not yet been bitten by the question that fueled me to embark on my healthy habits journey, so food and drink were activities high on the agenda for the weekend.

Keep reading for more info on some dining spots I’d recommend!

Stove & Tap West Chester, Downtown West Chester

We ate dinner at Stove & Tap on our first night in town. The restaurant had a polished, industrial-chic vibe, replete with light fixtures strung from pulleys, rope dividers, antique-y tin ceiling tiles, and an airy, modern color scheme throughout. The food was delicious! Menu highlight: Fried Brussels Sprouts

Sedona Taphouse, Downtown West Chester

Sedona Taphouse called to us as we passed by on our walk back to our hotel after Stove & Tap and we decided we’d make a reservation for the next night. It did not disappoint. Despite its lofty ceilings and copper touches, the stone walls and warm lighting gave this place a super cozy vibe. Everything we tried was delicious and our server was kind and attentive. If you’re in the area, snag a reservation! Menu highlight: Bacon Wrapped Scallops

Braeloch Brewing, Kennett Square, PA

If you have a passion for beer and are visiting Longwood Gardens for the day or are just visiting Kennett Square, I recommend giving this place a try for a brew or a flight and some lunch. The food was hearty and there were some good options for sharables on the menu. The beers available on tap rotate, but there is a good range of options for beer lovers of all preferences. They even have Athletic Brewing non-alcoholic beers on their menu, along with seltzers and a selection of soft drinks for those who prefer not to drink alcohol. The vibe was cool, quirky, and rustic and there is a sign by the bathrooms that I hope makes you laugh as much as it made me laugh. Sometimes, it’s just the little things, you know?

Stargazers Vineyard, Coatesville, PA

This picturesque vineyard was nestled at the very end of a rural, residential street and we loved the idea that people living in this little neighborhood could just walk a few steps up the hill to a winery and vineyard. Besides us, there was only one other group in the small tasting room, a group of friends who seemed to know the barman and who had brought a picnic and a sleepy dog with them. We sat at a sunbathed table by the window overlooking the rows of vines, competing with the ladybugs on the windowpane for an unimpeded view. Our time here was relaxing and the atmosphere was laid back and friendly, like a little neighborhood gathering spot. The barman played different songs as they came to him and provided a commentary of why he was choosing the next song. As we were paying our tab after finishing our flight of wine, he asked why we had come to the area in the way I mentioned earlier and then he asked if I had listened to Beyoncé’s country album, Cowboy Carter, yet. He seemed disappointed that I had not; in fact I still haven’t listened to it yet. Sorry! I know! I’ll pop it on now while I continue writing this post.

And now, onto our non-food or drink related main activity for the weekend…

Longwood Gardens

I recommend visiting Longwood Gardens when all of the fountains are on. It was still very pretty when we went and we were lucky to be able to see the beautiful tulips, but be sure to time your visit better than we did if you are going in hopes of seeing the fountain water shows. From what I read, they are supposed to be pretty impressive, I, however, cannot attest firsthand as only one small fountain was on while we were visiting.

The Open Air Theatre Fountain is open from early May to mid November. If you are reading this when I am posting it, you still have until November 17th to catch a water show before the fountains are turned off for the season! If you do visit during the colder months, be sure to visit the indoor conservatory to wander around in the tropical oasis curated within. There is a beer garden, cafe, restaurant, and store located on the grounds as well if you are a one-stop-shop kind of person or group looking for a full day activity.

Shopping

West Chester offers a cute, walkable downtown, which is what drew me to pick it for vacation in the first place. I like to peruse little independent shops that have set up their establishments in little red brick buildings. That’s just who I am and who I will always be and I find it relaxing.

I am addicted to stationary, in particular, and I know that in a cute walkable downtown, there is always at least one shop where I can find unique stationary and cards. I like to write and send and frame and stock as many cards as will fit in my designated stationary drawer. Maybe I have a problem. Who knows? (Me. I know. But that’s ok right?!) Anyway, I found what I was on the hunt for in West Chester, a baby shower card for a friend, in a shop called Thistle Be Perfect and that was my purchasing complete for the weekend.

So my friends, whether you are looking for a laid back daytrip from Philly or a weekend getaway from a little further afield like we were, I’d say West Chester is worth giving some thought! There’s a little bit of something for everyone and it’s not a bear to plan, which always has its benefits. You can kind of pick and choose your itinerary as you go, so if that’s how you like to travel, check it out for yourself! With that, I’ll end this post and look forward to telling you about another destination in the Keystone State next time! Thanks for reading! 🙂